some family history---

this was from a paper, but it's about me and my background so i thought i would post it....

Sarah Christina Williams is my given name. Williams, my last name, is the first descriptor of my background and heritage. Joseph Monroe Williams, my father was the one to explain to me where our name came from, though the Williams surname is Norman (genealogy). In our family it was passed down from the Williams plantation. My father is a black man, third generation free. His grandpa was born into slavery but died a free man. On my mothers side we are Italian her grandpa Parisella came over on a boat to America from Sicily, Italy. Though I am an American I have strong heritage and culture on both sides. The cultures of my family and those that came before me greatly influence me from simple things like how I look, down to the music I listen to, and what I make for dinner. The strong upbringing from my parents and strong family ties shape my cultural identity. I share many similar beliefs, outlooks, and values with my peers however I am also different in many ways. I am very open, and what most Americans would call “touchy-feely”. I have no personal space, I greet with a hug and or kiss, and some people get genuinely freaked out by that. My communication style is OPEN! Talk, talk, talk, about anything and everything openly and honestly. The upbringing I experienced was unique as it made me who I am. Both parents carefully instilled values that are not normally found in today’s society. My father taught me my word was all I have as a woman that no one could take away. If I would be and who and what I say I am, that is worthy of respect. So that I what I strive for, I respect others and myself, when I give my word I follow through. Another part of my upbringing that was incredibly unique was skin color. My cultural identity affected who I was as a person, for me it brought security as well as questions. In my town growing up we were the only mixed family. I grew up being able to communicate well with both my black family and my white (Italian) family. Wherever I went I had to learn to blend, to fit in. I grew up listening to rap music and boxing with my brothers, I grew up in the kitchen and playing Barbie’s with my sister. My communication skills had to not only be cross culture, but cross gender as well.

i knew i was going to have to bear my soul someday...here ya go.

I have always belonged to you and in the dead of night when the world rises up against me and storms whisper against my window it is you that calms the beating of my ever racing heart. The only knowledge of who I am comes from you gently teaching me your ways. Patience never falters, love never fails, as I so desperately seek fulfillment. You hold my gaze, you acknowledge me, and we begin again. When I lose focus you hold me tight. You never let me walk away… You know me like no other, you see through the facades, and still you choose me. So I choose you, I love you, for this gentle leading I tell you I am yours.

Testing the system

Is anyone else wondering where in the world March went? I mean January and February pretty much flew by, by March is just GONE! It’s already the end of the month. It seems like after finals week/spring break I just got lost. I got grades back. *eeeks* So guys I am about to test the system, wish me luck.. I am going to follow the procedure for grade appeals as outlined in the student handbook. I had a class in which I put all my effort into. My other grades even suffered for it, however I knew it would be difficult and in order to achieve the “A” I had to work for it. So I did, only to be told my best wasn’t good enough… So not only was that a downer, I don’t believe it was right. I believe the certain assignment which I am challenging was an A quality paper. I put forth more effort, research, and time then any paper at this school thus far and I do well in school, so that’s saying a lot. I don’t know if the Professor doesn’t give A’s (Which I don’t think they do) or whatever the circumstance was, but we will see what the system can do. Wish me luck, I’ll keep you posted!

After work on Wednesday driving to Pennsylvania seemed like a really good idea. I was done at 2:30. I had the car packed and was on the road by 3:20. My mom lives at the very top of Pennsylvania, right near the New York border, but I can complete the trip in 7 ½ to eight hours. That would put me to my mom’s house at 11 at the latest, seemingly no problem… RIGHT… Except the getting stuck! I live in the mountains in a valley so the only way I know to get to my mom’s is back roads and through the mountains. About 2 hours outside of Coudy the fog was so thick coming over the mountains I couldn’t see anything in front of me… I debated pulling my car over and crying like a little girl, but I figured it wouldn’t do me much good, so for the next 2 (turned into 3 ½) hours I pressed on with my hazard lights on, praying, and speaking in tongues… What can I say? I didn’t know what else to do and you don’t get cell service in the mountains that I drive to get home. By the time I got home to surprise my mom I was so happy to be out of the rain and fog, but what had I driven into? SNOW….There was snow everywhere! Wednesday night there was a huge thunderstorm, it poured all night. We woke up to flash flooding on Thursday. Everything then proceeding to freeze then came a blizzard. I picked a great weekend to go home, eh? Needless to say after landing my car in the snow and getting stuck twice if I never the "s" word again, it might be too soon… *brrrr*

Freudia

Now that I’m all grown up I don’t actually get a spring break, I get to go to work with the rest of the adults. *Boo* I’ve been reverting back to child hood for awhile now. I have been independent for almost five years. Three years ago my father past away, the first two years after he died I lived in a dorm. I was pretty well taken care of by the campus; everything I needed was at my finger tips. This year I went back to apartment living. *SCARY* Now if I don’t make rent I’m screwed. There is no calling up daddy and saying hey can you spot me a few hundred… I’m forced to be an adult, so now I don’t think I want to be. It’s quite a dilemma. I’m sure some counseling student would have a blast psycho analyzing me; however I’m just taking it one day at a time, trusting that God has me in his hands. So my spring beak plans… fish sitting for my roommates fish. Freudia. It’s like a week long slumber party, if I don’t go out the fun comes in…… *stellar*

trust...

So… It’s the final week of classes, everything is due Monday… All 20 pages of the everything I have left. I would make a humorous joke about taking the highest bidder to due it for me however, I think I’ll steer clear from that joke today :) … In truth it’s been a positively awful week however we all have those. I’ve been waking up at 5 am this week for NOOO good reason, my body just says wake up even though it went to sleep not so long ago! This makes for an interesting morning. Yesterday I ended up barely making it to work on time wearing one earring and white socks with my black dress slacks… For some reason unbeknownst to me I left the house in red shoes; however I had to come back in to fix that problem. It was officially a day I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed. I've heard about those, but haven't experienced one till yesterday...A little bad news a work topped it off, and I feel like I’m barely swimming. So I give up, and I give full control to God, which is where the control should have been in the first place. Lets see if this swimming can get me somewhere besides in laps… I trust that it will...